Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Operation Outcry: Testimonies of Women Who Regret Abortions

While abortionist William Harrison gets all the accolades in the state's establishment newspaper, a few weeks ago a very moving ceremony was conducted in the Rotunda of the Capitol in Little Rock. Women who had gotten an abortion came together in a ceremony that included testimonies of pain and regret, and also to give a name to their unborn children.

Millie Lace, of Concepts of Truth Ministries, organized the event. Below are some testimonies of women who were victims of the lie that is abortion....



Blogger Mark Moore (Moderator) said...

Kandi’s TestimonyMy name is Kandi Cox, from Cabot, AR. I was 19 years old when I was faced with an unplanned pregnancy.

As I thought through what was happening in my life I felt scared and alone. At that time in my life I did not feel I had anyone to turn to that I could count on to guide and help me. The father of the baby made it very clear that he did not want this child and I felt so trapped. I could see no other choice but to terminate my pregnancy.

I called an abortion clinic and spoke with them about my situation and they told me that I needed to come in and confirm that I was even pregnant. I went to the abortion clinic in Memphis, TN where they confirmed my pregnancy. Next I was led to a “Counseling Room” where I was told that it was only a “blob” of tissue and it was not yet a baby. Then the counselor looked at me and said “whose choice is this?” Being that I was all alone at this point I simply said “mine?” Although I felt pressure from the father and my situation, I felt silly responding any other way.

Soon afterward I was led upstairs to the room where my abortion was to take place. They gave me gas and told me to relax. The doctor examined me, looked at the nurse and stated how far along I was. At that point I knew I could go no further. Then a heard a noise that sent chills down my whole body and immediately felt sick at my stomach, I cried out and told them that I could not go through with this. I BEGGED FOR THEM TO STOP! The nurse told me that it was too late and ran to the door and yelled for help because I was fighting her and the doctor, next thing I knew I had three nurses holding me down. All I can remember at that point was moving my head back and forth trying so hard to get loose.

When the procedure was over I was taken to a room filled with beds and women sobbing. I felt so empty and violated. No one ever told me of the anxiety, depression, guilt, or emotional scars that I would bear, nor did they warn me of the miscarriages that I would have due to the damage in my uterus.

I praise God for His healing, glorious grace, but I share my story because I don’t want anyone else to suffer the way I have. God has blessed my husband Chris and me with two beautiful little girls that we love dearly, but we regret that on this side of Glory they will never know Amanda Abigail. ABORTION HURTS WOMEN!

12:31 PM, February 08, 2006  
Blogger Mark Moore (Moderator) said...

Sandra’s Testimony

I came to a Planned Parenthood facility here in Little Rock, Arkansas fifteen years ago to have an abortion. I remember the first thing that happened was the payment. 10 twenty dollar bills (counted out one by one on the table) was all that was needed. Simple enough for a “simple procedure”.

It was so quick and easy. It would have been much more complicated for me to have opened a checking account that day than to have had an abortion. What could be bad about that? My problem was solved and the abortion clinic had their money. Everybody was happy now and I could go on with my life.But there was no “simple recovery”.

Fifteen years later, I still cannot say I have fully recovered. I wish I could lay down 10 twenty dollar bills on a table today and be rid of the constant shame of having had an abortion. I wish I could lay down 10 twenty dollar bills and have (what I know now was my child!!!) back. But I cannot. And that leaves me with a lot of anger because I feel like I was not given all the information. Now, looking back, I feel deceived, ignorant, and appallingly lacking in plain common sense.

Because abortion advocates provide little education to prepare you for the overwhelming sense of loss you will feel after abortion, the emotional, spiritual, and psychological aftershock came to me totally unexpected. I did not expect to feel grief! But I did. And because society does not allow women to grieve abortion as a pregnancy loss, I went on with my life in monumental denial. This unresolved grief led to many bad choices including alcoholism, destructive carelessness, and an insatiable desire to destroy anything good that came into my life. I am sad to look back at the many bad choices I made after the abortion and the relationships that were destroyed. And I am sad that I lived for so many years not even realizing these destructive behaviors were related to my past abortion!

Unfortunately, my speech today will not stop the almost 4,000 abortions that will happen in this country today. However, my speech can begin to chip away at the lack of awareness that fuels the abortion industry.

Many people are simply unaware of the traumatic and severely negative reactions women have had to abortion. But you do not have to suffer in silence anymore. You are not alone in your pain if you have had an abortion. Your story is not unique. It is much more common that you could ever imagine. There is help. Please call 1-866-482LIFE. Someone is waiting there to get you the help you thought you’d never find

12:32 PM, February 08, 2006  
Blogger Mark Moore (Moderator) said...

Debbie’s TestimonyOn my 19th birthday, I allowed the murder of my baby by way of an abortion.The baby’s father and me got married but decided not have a baby, we convinced ourselves that “we just weren’t ready.”

On July 18, 1975, we arrived at a regular doctor’s office, clean and professional. This aided in the illusion that I was doing the “right thing”. My only concern at the time was getting this done before the tissue turned into a baby, I believed the lie that was being told at that time. You don’t realize, before your abortion, that the trauma you are so willing to put your body through will have deep and lasting consequences later in your life and I spent more than 25 years living in a continuous nightmare. The regret has been unbearable, wondering what my son would have looked like, what would he have accomplished in this world.

Up until 4 years ago I wasn’t even able to say the word abortion and all I wanted was just to forget and never think it about again. God however, needed me to remember my abortion so that He could heal my pain, stop my nightmares and put an end to my destructive behaviors.

It may be a woman’s right to choose – But abortion, as your only choice is no choice at all and leads to a life of total devastation. There are more people affected by an abortion than just the baby and the mother. I now realize that I denied the father, grandparents, siblings, other family members, teachers, and even the church a valuable person to know and love. What the world has been denied, Heaven has received and been blessed. If only one women is convinced not to abort her child – then Heaven will rejoice.

12:34 PM, February 08, 2006  
Blogger Mark Moore (Moderator) said...

Amy’s Testimony

My name is Amy Burns and in August of 1991, without any pressure from anyone except for the circumstances of my situation, I chose to have an abortion. I was divorced and already had two young children and felt that I did not want nor could I have another baby.

Now, more than 13 years later, I regret that choice. I had several difficulties following the procedure, which put my life in danger, not to mention the depression that followed later. I have since found healing and peace only through the grace and forgiveness of my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

I want women to know that they, too, can find this same peace. My baby would have been born in February of 1992 had I chosen to give it life. I believed I was making the best decision at the time, but now I know my “right to choose” was a lie. I chose a life of wondering whether my baby was a boy or a girl, what would it have looked like and been like, and many more questions I will never know the answer to. I also have the vivid memory of the abortion procedure and the guilt of knowing I never gave my baby a chance at life – the opportunity of fulfilling the plans God had especially for him or her.

Because of my decision, my doctor agreed to tie my tubes as a form of birth control. I have since remarried, but am unable to have a baby with my husband who has and now never will have any children of his own. My abortion has affected me and others in my life in ways I never thought of, ways no one ever told me about.

My prayer today is that the lie of abortion will be overcome by the power of all the testimonies shared here. I pray that other women who bought into that lie like I did, will hear or see this and will reach out for the hope that we, through Christ, are able to offer. We can be Silent No More about the real truth of the effects of abortion.

12:36 PM, February 08, 2006  
Blogger Mark Moore (Moderator) said...

Melissa’s Testimony

Although my abortion was over 17 years ago, every day I live with the consequence of this choice. At age 18 in an abusive relationship, I found myself pregnant. Arriving at the clinic, I was told it was a simpleprocedure and it appeared to be my way out of my crisis. I walked into the clinic scared, confused, unsure of what else to do, but I walked out that day, empty and broken inside.

For fifteen years I struggled withdepression, self-hatred, and anger before I found healing. Looking back, I wish someone would have told me their story. That they would haveshared their pain, of having made this choice. I believe it would have made a difference for me.

I have found healing and restoration for my life, and now teach post-abortive classes,
for those who are suffering from the effects of abortion. My greatest desire is to warn those who are young, not to fall into the same pitfalls I did. There's not a day that goes by, that I don't think about my children whom I have never seen. Make better decisions for your life.

It is my hope that your choice never finds you in a crisis pregnancy, however, if they do, choose life;
this is an option you will never regret.

Childs name: Elijah Jordan

12:38 PM, February 08, 2006  
Blogger Mark Moore (Moderator) said...

Amber’s Testimony

It is a simple procedure that is resetting your body’s natural time clock. This statement is untrue, yet for all of the women who have experienced abortion this is what we have been told. When in fact what they should tell you about is the depression, lack of self worth, anger, guilt and anxiety that you are likely to experience after your abortion.

These are some of the symptoms of PAS or post-abortion syndrome. I believe that if someone had told me the truth about abortion 11 years ago I would have made a different decision. As a sixteen year old I choose to have my first abortion. This sent me on a downward spiral and later I made the choice for abortion again.

I lived with self-hatred and worthlessness for years; it didn’t only effect me, my relationships with family and friends suffered also. I believed abortion was the unforgivable sin. It wasn’t until I became a wife and mother that I realized my need for help was much greater than the shame I lived with daily. I found healing and restoration for my life just over a year ago and am now part of a leadership team for post-abortive women.

I have accepted God’s Grace and forgiveness that was always there for me and I have forgiven myself. There is help for those who are suffering in silence from abortion. You are not alone. Everyday I think about my children and everyday I pray that others will not make the choice I did. By sharing my story I hope to Save One, One Woman, One child. Choose life!

12:39 PM, February 08, 2006  
Blogger Mark Moore (Moderator) said...

Dail’s Testimony

I am here today because I regret my abortion and it is not good for women or men. I want America to know the truth. Most doctors and all abortionists do not want to tell you about the pain women experience. My wife had taken an experimental drug for her bladder, our family doctor urged us to abort this baby, and her life was in danger.

We went to Planned Parenthood in Little Rock, AR. Some people say they are Choice, what they are really saying is that they want their baby to die so they can live a particular lifestyle or not have the responsibility of raising that child. If that is not a selfish choice, I don’t know what is. We were not told about the risks or the consequences my wife and I would suffer later. Our family doctor didn’t tell us that my wife might bleed uncontrollably. He never mentioned the emotional torment my wife and I would face. He said, “You need to have this abortion before the baby’s heart starts beating”. My wife was in her seventh week of pregnancy. We now know that at four weeks her heart was beating.

The most important thing about abortion that I believe everyone needs to know is that is takes the life of a child. I will never get to take my little girl to school on her first day, never be at her 1st birthday party, never meet her first boyfriend, never walk her across the football field at homecoming game.

I will never here her play or join in the everyday conversations a girl has with her brothers. The lies about abortion are coming to the surface. We cannot undo what has happened to our children and our lives. What we can do is tell our stories and let people know that it is painful and we want to prevent people from making the same mistake we did.

Jill would be almost 26 years old now, a lot of times I wonder what type of nurse or teacher or housewife she would be. Give all your children personhood and honor; let people hear their stories. We all would like to thank you for coming here today and listening to us. We hope that what you here today will open some eyes about abortion. There are a lot of Moms and Dads out there who need healing, and the God who gave us life can certainly heal our lives.

12:40 PM, February 08, 2006  
Blogger Mark Moore (Moderator) said...

Millie Lace, Arkansas

In 1979 while I was taking an experimental drug for a tumor on my bladder, I became pregnant. My doctor told me I could not have the baby because my life could be in danger and that my baby could be a monster. He said I must have a D & C (dilation and curettage) quickly before the baby’s heart started beating. I was seven weeks pregnant, 25 years old and a healthy “mother’s health exception” candidate for an abortion, although the doctor never used that word.

I was married to my husband, now of 30 years, and had a three-year-old son. I felt pressure to choose between my three year old I could see and the “blob of tissue” that was the unknown. We were active church members and a Christian family. We called our parents and close family. We prayed and decided to take the doctor’s advice. I honestly thought I had to have this “cleaning out” or I would not be around to raise my three yr. old son. My doctor sent me to a Planned Parenthood facility in Little Rock. I wonder now why I was sent there if my pregnancy was at risk?

I remember the cold table and the almost empty room. The nurse told me it would be over quickly, wouldn’t hurt, and that I could return to work in a couple of days. She was absolutely wrong! I remember hearing the machine and beginning to wonder, “What is happening to me?”

After coming home I felt excruciating pain and immediate mental anguish. I tried to walk and began hemorrhaging. More body parts came out as I went to the bathroom! I cried myself to sleep and the depression began. I couldn’t even say the word abortion and I wanted to punish myself. I repressed the event for over 12 years before I could admit the truth thanks to another woman’s testimony. And had it not been for my relationship with God, I would have lost my mind. I continually had many pelvic infections, endometriosis, and had to have a hysterectomy at an early age.
I believe the question that was not answered by the courts in 1973 of “What is it?” must be answered. I have given my daughter, Jill Allison personhood and honor in order to grieve her loss and begin to heal. Her size, level of development, environment, and degree of dependency did not justify her death.

Abortion took the life of my daughter. After all, we don’t kill dead things, right? In 1979 the nurse said, “This will be over quickly,” but that has not been true in my experience. I will have regret for the rest of my life. Abortion hurt me and I will be Silent No More.

If you have had an abortion, I want you to know that you are not alone. Research says almost one in two women that are age 45 have had an abortion –or 43%. Please call the toll free number 1-866-482-LIFE and find help today. Shame is the ultimate silencer but the truth will set you free. Be silent no more. ______________________________ Millie is the director of and professional counselor for Concepts of Truth, Inc., a non-profit professional counseling and care pregnancy center. The center also offers support groups and Bible studies for post-abortive men and women and coordinates an abortion recovery National Helpline. Her husband Dail is the president and is active in working with post-abortive men.

Concepts of Truth, Inc. originated the Ananias Project to help churches understand that women and men are hurting from abortion, have a need to find healing and a need for the church to reach out to them. Please call 1-866-482-LIFE for help or scheduling information.

12:41 PM, February 08, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why do you delete the posts of people who disagree with you?

Shouldn't everyone have the chance ot be heard? Isn't there a 1st amendment that guarantees freedom of speech?

7:29 AM, February 10, 2006  
Blogger Mark Moore (Moderator) said...

Last time I deleted your comment rather than embarassing you by telling you that you are an idiot. It seems you will have it no other way.

The post I deleted, along with your protest against its deletion, consisted of nothing but a list of links to porn sites.

No, not everyone should have a "chance to be heard" on Arkansas Watch. Instead, people who want intelligent, rational debate that is free of profanity and smut should have a place to go. I want AW to be such a place.

These testamonies are very moving. They are basically memorial services. You want to trash out a memorial service and then whine about "free speech". What you are doing is the on-line equivilent of spraying graffitti on tombstones and then hollering about your free speech when those who care about the departed object.

When I posted this thread I originally thought to lock it for all replies. This was because I knew there are heartless cads in this world who had pressured women into killing their own children. Those same lawless men would not respect the heart-cries of the women expressed here, but would try some act of on-line vandalism.

As for the "first amendment", the first amendment does not require me to give you the soapbox on which to shout obscenities while I try to conduct a solemn memorial service. Get your own soapbox elsewhere. If the founders were alive today and could listen to you spout your ideas of what the first amendment meant I would not be surprised if they challenged you to a duel.

As David said of his enemies, 'their minds are dull and brutal'. Go away troll.

8:53 AM, February 10, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mark Moore, you are lying when you say it included links to porn sites. I have screen captures of my posts. Shall I post them and prove you wrong?

6:43 AM, February 13, 2006  
Blogger --Tyler said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

6:46 AM, February 13, 2006  
Blogger --Tyler said...

Mr. Moore,

The Anonymous poster informed me of his and your post. Let's set the record straight, shall we?

I saw the original post by anonymous that you deleted. Mr. Moore, that post did not include links to porn sites. That post also did not include any profanity as you say it did. Mr. Moore, why are you taking it upon yourself to libel the poster? They did nothing wrong but express their beliefs. While you do not agree with it, you should accept it. That is what our wonderful country was built upon!

--Tyler F. Dunegan
Mississippi County Republican Chairman

6:50 AM, February 13, 2006  
Blogger Mark Moore (Moderator) said...

Listen to what you both, if you are not the same person, are defending. Excuse me, they were not LINKS to porn sites, just URLS of sites like "10inchDrew" and stuff like that. I tried to have a solemn thread about women who have suffered through the pain of an abortion and someone tries to pollute it by posting URL's that include "10inchDrew" and trash like that. It is disgusting.

Was our country built on that? Our wonderful country was built upon the idea that human life was sacred, that men were bound by a sense of propriety and decency. Only with that underlying sense of virtue can free expression produce a more just and noble society. Apart from that restraint, "freedom of expression" unbridled by any sense of propriety produces only coarseness and uglyness. There are plenty of places you can do that, but you insist on coming to AW and trashing it out. I say no, and I make no apology for that.

8:15 AM, February 13, 2006  
Blogger --Tyler said...

Mr. Moore,

You seem to be a bit paranoid. I do believe my post clearly indicated that the anonymous poster contacted me. Does that mean I contacted myself. I post under my account Mr. Moore and if you have trouble believing that, then check IP addresses.

I am not attempting to trash anything. You on the other hand are attempting to trash someone's character by libeling his or her name saying they posted URLs of pornographic websites. As I stated, I viewed the original post, and it did not contain any links to websites of that nature. You are running a website and acting as its dictator by deleting posts that do not agree with you 100%. That sir is disgusting.

Do not attempt to lecture me on what our country was built upon. I said our country was built on the fact that someone could express their beliefs. You disagreed with me on that. Sir, I will mail you a copy of the Bill of Rights if you would like.

--Tyler F. Dunegan
Mississippi County Republican Chairman

12:51 PM, February 13, 2006  
Blogger Mark Moore (Moderator) said...

Oh, so you are not the guy spraying graffitti on the tombstones at a funeral, just his lawyer, arguing technicalities. I don't care if it technically was not a "link" because it was simply a URL in text, it was still off-topic, distasteful, and inappropriate. I will not stoop to prattling with you over just how distatsteful something has to be before I deem it pornographic.

I don't see how I can "libel the character" of someone who posts anonymously. If anything, you libel me by accusing me of "deleting posts that you do not agree with 100%". Our regulars know that is not true. There are limits that we do enforce though, and I am one of the beat cops around here.

And on AW I will lecture you on anything I care to. If you don't like it, change the channel. If you prefer to hang out at sites where the standards are a little bit lower, then go there, rather than try to attack our standards.

1:27 PM, February 13, 2006  
Blogger --Tyler said...

Mr. Moore,

I do not intend to discuss this with you anymore on this message board. My time has been wasted enough. I have e-mailed you and I hope that you will return the e-mail.

2:30 PM, February 13, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Do the Mississippi County Republicans know who they have as their chairman? Someone lacking decency and who doesn't even understand a proper application of the first amendment...

3:38 PM, February 13, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


Shame on you for defending evil!!!!

The Bible says,

"Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet , and sweet for bitter!"
Isaiah 5:20

You should be praising this blog for standing for truth and life NOT smut and death!

You should be ashamed of yourself and if you didn't want to be put in your place then don't post unless you are certain that you are right: )

4:48 PM, February 13, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yes we know what type of chairman Tyler is. He is a great chairman who is getting things accomplished in the northeast. He is regaining the Republican majority.

I see people are coming out of the woodwork to attack him. Tyler is a great Republican. He has Godly morals and is a dedicated Christian. Apparently none of you know him. Judge not!

Have you people forgot what the first amendment is? From my reading it looks to me that Tyler was standing up for someone who expressed their opinion but had their post taken off.

I dont see where he defended evil. All he did was say people shouldn't have their posts removed if they disagree and people shouldn't say hurtful things unless they can back them up. Show me where Tyler defended evil and I will apologize but I am sitting here reading everything and I do not see anything like it.

8:28 PM, February 13, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

There is no way a guy like that is "regaining the Republican majority".

5:45 AM, February 14, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


Maybe you should think before you speak, and come to Miss Co and see.

Contct Tyler, I am sure he would take you around.

Even Jim Holt told people he was impressed with him when he came to Miss Co when he was running for Senate. I was in the group he told it to.

6:07 AM, February 14, 2006  
Anonymous Richie said...

Tyler told me a few days ago that Jim Holt called him because he thought Tyler was upset with him.

If Tyler is as bad as you say he is, why would Jim Holt waste his time on him and care?

6:27 AM, February 14, 2006  
Anonymous Why can't we all just get along? said...

Both Mark and Tyler are out of line.

Mark, I enjoyed the thread. I appreciate you posting it.

Tyler, I am thankful that there are people who standup for the rights of others. You were not out of line.

Guys, make up and not be enemies of each other. We are supposed to be working togther for the common good!

9:32 AM, February 14, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What morons to think the first amendment applies to a private blog. Such an interpretation of our constitution puts you in the camp of those who want to force the Scouts to accept homos as troop leaders.

With Republicans like these, who needs liberals?

11:03 AM, February 14, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It is one thing to discuss intelligent issues but to sit and name call on a "Christian" blog is sad.

Show me in the Bible where homosexuals are refered to as homos.

11:39 AM, February 14, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

2:04 PM, February 14, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

They used to be called "queers", but they didn't like that. They insisted on being called homosexuals. Funny how they love calling themselves queers though. I'm not interested in how people who want to parade around their sexual perversion prefer to be called.

2:07 PM, February 14, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey 11:39--They're just exercising their 1st amendment rights!

2:16 PM, February 14, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

anon@11:35, is that you Drew?

2:32 PM, February 14, 2006  

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